MyTimeToBlog
I'm wide awake at 3 AM, on December 31st, 2025, celebrating my 49th birthday in my bunk. A wave of nausea collided with me as I braced my hand on the barred window. I made it 27 years in a cell, and now I'm starting my last year in my 40s. My head was ringing with cathedral bells as I blocked the noise with music from my tablet. I closed my eyes and began cardiac coherence, centering my breathing as the hand of my celly Ryan smacked my stomach as he shouted, "Happy birthday, bruh."
That energy he displayed brought me out of my meditative state. I sat up with him and talked about the close of 2025. We did this while The Witcher played on our TVs as background noise. We shook our heads as we realized that we made it through another year, then the cell's door opened.
My mind was on wanting to call my family, but that was interrupted by all my friends hugging me and saying, "Happy birthday." I'm consumed with joyful emotions as Ramutu pulled me into our daily workout. I might be 49 years old, but routine was what prison was about, so I kept my commitment with my workout partners.
Once done, I'm being handed supplies for the close-out meal for 2025 for eight of my friends. I would be cooking for my birthday. Freaky Tacos were what I wanted, and being one of the best cooks in our housing unit, I didn't desire anybody screwing up my meal.
I checked out the Jpay system and saw I had 6 emails in my inbox. That made me smile, especially when I saw my family thought of me on my birthday. I stopped the tears from coming down my cheek because it's been two decades plus of being without my family's hugs and kisses. Then, as a birthday gift, my Queen, my love, sent me enough e-cards that I smiled. She even gifted money that allowed me to purchase a few albums to be my soundtrack for my special day. Love you, my sexy lady.
After a shower and a quick change, I called on Whammy and Cipher to cut up the onions and sausage for our meals. While they did, I made two Oreo cookie cheesecakes and grape-flavored taffy for Haneef, who was lactose intolerant.
Once I completed the desserts, I made a 10 o'clock call to my family. As soon as I heard the call was accepted, my first happy birthday song was sung to me. That had me smiling as we conversed about how it felt to be an old man, then I asked what was their most proud moment of 2025?
I felt that we should focus on the positive aspects of the year. That kept me asking my friends all day, but once I had all the food ready, my focus was on making 24 Freaky Tacos. As I did, I had Big Boogie's Bop blasting in my ears. I'm dancing as I'm making six tortilla wraps with refried beans, Doritos, sausages, mackerel, onions, pickles, corn, mozzarella, and jalapeño cheese. Now, as I'm making this feast, I'm being told that Amir said if he didn't eat with us, we wouldn't be friends anymore. He was joking.
It took me a few hours to get everything done. When I saw what I had left over, I could make 3 more Freaky Tacos. I called Amir, Chino, and Benny to the cell. Each of these men was my friends who I blessed with a Freaky Taco.
Now I came out of the cell and received two birthday cards. One from Bolo, who gifted me with Polo prayer oil, and Ryan, whose words in the card brought me to tears: He said he was inspired by how much I changed, and how I always helped others along the way.
That remained with me as I called my mother, who called my middle sister. They sang for me, and my niece told me she wanted to speak with me. So, I promised I would call her tomorrow. That made my day, because she missed me, then I called my youngest sister.
My youngest sister called our oldest brother, then he called our oldest sister, who called our father, then surprisingly, my oldest brother called my nephew, while my oldest sister's children wished me happy birthday. I choked up when they all sang me happy birthday. Technology made me feel like I was right there with them. I had my hugs and kisses I so much desired.
My final call was to my Queen. We spoke on the new year coming to a close, and how we both wanted our lives to become better. We laughed, then as the minutes ticked away, we ended our call with the joy of knowing we weren't alone anymore.
I received so much love as Haneef passed me a chocolate cake he made for me. Lex gave me some food, while Rah-Rah called me to my cell and gave me a giant chocolate chip cookie and fried fish, and then I was given two more birthday cards and a New York Knicks' poster from Lex, who placed the cards in my hands.
In life, you know who you are to those around you by the actions you take. I say this because when I opened up those cards, words of love showcased how much friendship I had in my life. Now they did joke the hell out of me, but that's what we did to each other: we talked crap because we cared. Crazy, but it's a prison thing. My favorite part was when Mike told me to give him my birthday cards.
Mike signed them and joked, "How the hell did you get two cards on your birthday and I didn't get any on my birthday?" It was all fun as I hugged him and said, "Happy New Year." We smiled as Lex shot me the middle finger from the top tier, yelling out, "Tut is now 94 years old!" This turned into a joke fest as everybody began calling me old man, and promising me they would kick my butt 49 times.
I laughed as I sat at the table with Chris, who was stuffed on Freaky Tacos. We chatted about life. We always did, and my smile never left my face. I'm 49 years old in prison and I'm smiling after spending 27 years in a cell, away from society. Tomorrow I'll keep that energy as I sit with my friends, happy, alive, and growing into a better man as I wait to call my niece who misses me.
As I lay in my bunk, watching the world celebrate the year, I reflected on today. I'm blessed, but I won't make it to midnight; I never do anymore. I had my celebration earlier in the day, so I'll sleep, dreaming of the blessings I experienced today, grateful that love, growth, and joy were possible in prison.
No matter where you are, remember this: you are loved, you can smile, and you deserve happiness. If I'm receiving it in prison, you definitely can as well. Happy New Year, and again, smile, life is beautiful.